Where is Dummi?

Back in second PU, I had a friend called Dummi. Equipped with a robust voice, and an even more robust waistline, he was one of my best friends and wreckers-in-chief of any IIT aspirations. Not someone to be taken lightly, however. Ferocious, free with his words, and one for a good time. We'd had many a memorable moment, one of which included him crashing right into a garbage bin, something that has been immortalized on video. By all means, one of the better things to have happened to me that year.

However, since I've joined my engineering course, his appearances have been as rare as meaningful quotes from Megan Fox. Last I saw him was four months ago in his erstwhile house which he seems to have upped and left for greener pastures of which I do not know the whereabouts. He does not come online, and his mobile phone number seems to have changed. My friends and I have tried futilely to contact him, and consequently have come to draw wild conclusions on the issue of what must possibly have happened to him.

1. He tried running away from home- This almost happened once, if rumors are to be believed. One witness claims Dummi had been walking with all his worldly possessions in a bundle on a stick which lay perched upon his shoulder. There were wild conclusions to be drawn as to the cause of this as well, but that's another story.

2. For reasons best known to him, he decided to commit suicide- We came up with four possible ways, but for the devil of us, could not see how it was feasible in his case:

a) Classic rope-hang: He weighed 95 kgs in second PU. And he didn't seem to want to change that. Those boffins haven't yet come up with a rope strong enough to take him. So no-go.

b) Cyanide: It would require a prodigious amount of that to bring him down. He would probably have to raid quite a few chemist shops to accumulate the necessary amount. I can safely put that kind of dedication past my friend.

c) Under the train: There have not been any recent reports of trains derailing on any of the lines that pass through Bangalore. No casualties either. They have been spared the horror of his attempt as of yet.

d) Building leap: Yediyurappa's government has had enough woes with the city's infrastructure. If Dummi tries this stunt, probably he might be able to do what the BJP high command couldn't. Shock the CM into resignation, what with the crater he'll cause. Probably the Bangalore Metro's second phase could use the head start with demolition.

3. He is in hiding somewhere- No. Period.

Therefore, my friends, employ whatever extrapolation skills you have been endowed with, help me find this friend of mine. Aid me in my quest, good people.

You can't really run, and you sure as hell can't hide, Dummi. We shall find you yet.